Watching:In a recent New York poll, if Clinton ran for governer of New York, he would receive around 60% of the popular vote; THIS is an example of how engaging and charismatic he is...
Clinton: horny, and not boring
Bush: boring, and not horny
There was another school shooting in California--near the other school shooting in California. And still, these kids haven't figured out that blowing up a mall would make such a better statement. Seriously, I want to see some psychologist on the news saying "This was not the act of a mad terrorist, this was merely a cry for help from a lonely teen...with an excellent working knowledge of plastic explosives."
I was watching this show on MSNBC called "Hot Pursuit" (about the police chasing/not chasing of speeding cars driven by criminals). And the show was interrupted to go to (you guessesd it) live coverage of a high speed police chase in California.
As good as Byars, Langley and Frohicke were as a subplot on the X-Files, the Lone Gunmen sucks as a tv show.
Elsewhere, it's reruns; nothing but reruns. Come on April!
Why is the Dennis Miller show only a 1/2 hour long?
It doesn't happen every Sunday, but sometimes on Sunday I wake up at 11 am, and drink my 3-5 cups of coffee while watching the 2 Sportsnight reruns on Comedy Central. Everybody in the world should strive to watch Sportsnight reruns on Sunday morning; it may be the single best televisual motivator ever. Check your local listings.
Hearing: I got the Gothic-Industrial Tribute to the Smashing Pumpkins, Buck Cherry, new Moby; also heard a live Smashing Pumpkins CD (with Mayonnaise). And at the last possible moment, Corey let me borrow both of his "Machina 2" Smashing Pumpkin CD's...
I feel like a kid again. I didn't even know that there was an album called "Machina 2"; a Smashing Pumpkins double album that was never sold in stores. It is a free download from the Smashing Pumpkins website. Cool. Imagine the excitement of discovering that there are 25 songs by one of your favorite bands that you've never heard. Awesome! Right now I am on my 4th listening to both CD's. Wow. This would be like finding 2 good Pink Floyd albums that I didn't know about. I am a happy kid this weekend.
What I want today: A big, fat sack of green--and some money would be nice, too.
I heard somewhere that when you want something (like a 19 inch computer monitor), you're supposed to describe it in detail--that crystallizes the thought in your mind. So; I want the $400 black 19 inch (18" viewable) NEC Multisync moniter at Fry's; with the obnoxiously high resolution, and the above-average dot pitch.
Also, I want to open a restaurant named "Hannibal's". Do you see where I'm going with this? I've already written ad copy for a radio commercial:
"Here at Hannibal's, you'll never see stray dogs or homeless people hanging out at the back dumpsters. You'll also appreciate the committment to customer service that our well-paid employees make, or they'll become a menu item, too. Do you have problem children? Not anymore; just bring 'em down to Hannibal's. We specialize in amazing attitude adjustments, AND in 'kiddie stew'. 'Behave, or be food' is our motto. So if you're looking for a nice meal in a very tense atmosphere, with some incredibly quiet children, come on down to Hannibal's; an idea who's time has come."
New stuff this month or so: Writing alot; poems and commentaries.
I have been on a video golf and pinball rampage: Folks, I scored a -24 on the Golden Tee Fore at the Phoenix Steverino's. And, nobody had gotten 40 million on the new Elvira Scared Stiff pinball yet, but I did it 3 times in March.
Rift's herb garden is growing strong; basil buds look very smokable.
TPG got me a pretty, new white Buffalo Bills cap, but not in time to keep Doug Flutie from being traded to the San Diego Chargers. Good luck in the city of school shootings, Doug.
What's different here than in college town: Pay attention: We have a NEW "Taco Stand" in Phoenix, and it's in the same parking lot as the "South Milledge Bi-Lo" of Phoenix.
Very near my current job, there is apparently another "Steverino's" in Phoenix that I need to go check out. I'm going to have to put up some pictures to clarify all of this. I kinda miss Athens.
Life with Static Girl: I'm training her to be a lazy, pissy narcissist. She's a quick study.
Okay, you know how stupid those "relationship quizzes" in the women's magazines are? Well, in the April copy of Maxim, there was a "Commit or Quit" relationship quiz. So I took it for me and Static Girl. Out of a POSSIBLE 360 points, she got 332. This makes her 92.2 % perfect. For her, in this quiz, I would score even HIGHER. My little depressed, pale, introverted, asocial, psychotic girlfriend! I wonder if she knows how lucky she is.
A thought to take with you: I saw a guy at Wal-Mart on a Sunday wearing a "Shut Up Bitch!" t-shirt. I wanted to ask him where he got it, but then I figured out what he would say if I did. So I kept quiet.
I keep reading, watching, and hearing discrepancies about George W. Bush. I even had a few paragraphs in here about the lies he used to get elected president (gee, imagine). But rather than waste our time, I have created a nice little chart down here--displaying the befores and afters of our new "President Wishy-Washy" (okay, okay; Static Girl created this chart; duh, but it was all my idea. Mine, mine, mine.)
| Before becoming president: | After "taking over" the presidency: |
| 1. In close elections, a manual recount is the only way to determine the correct result. | 1. Stop the Florida recount!!! |
| 2. I support a woman's right to choose. | 2. He's cut ALL Federal aid for abortions, and now he's being soft on militant pro-lifers. |
| 3. We need more guards, and better policing of out borders, because illegal immigration is out of control. | 3. We should freely open our borders to all people. |
| 4. I'll release all of the government documents on alien spacecraft and EBE's. | 4. What documents? |
| 5. He said he'd work for the people. | 5. He's working for big business. |
What I want today: Rollerblades and pads, maybe.
New stuff this month or so: writing alot, working overtime, sniffing nail polish hardener, losing my place/finding I'm lost,
What's different here than in college town: The level of average stupidity out here is amazing. A kid drowns, or almost drowns, everyday. And there's a couple of crazed driver chases every week; chemical spills are common, and fires! Hell, even without the mad arsonist we have, there're crazy fires everyday. Another summer out here should be fun!
Life with Static Girl: Either she's the best roommate in the world, or I am.
A thought to take with you: Stay alert; this won't be getting any easier.
"Physicians pour drugs of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less, into humans of which they know nothing."--Voltaire
Reading: Keys to Health-The Promise and Challenge of Holism (an Edgar
Cayce guide). And I heard about another Edgar Cayce book that I may have
to get; it's called "A Seer Out Of Season: The Life of Edgar Cayce." Other
than that, who reads? I can barely focus at all.
Watching: Tons of worthless tv season finales; not one worth mentioning. As part of her belated birthday celebration, I took rift to see "Shrek" at the new theaters; I even bought her some lemonade.
Hearing: There are many new CD's that I want, but don't yet have; like the new Everclear, Depeche Mode, REM, Aerosmith, and there are a couple of others too. But when a new Tool CD comes out, that's when it's time to stop dicking around with "would of, could of, and should of", and you go buy the new Tool CD. So I did. There is only one problem with the new Tool CD: it's #1 on the Billboard charts.
On the classic rock radio station here, I tuned in midway through Heart's "Magic Man"; wow. That song, and "Crazy on You" both deserve to be also-rans in the musical section. And then, Charles (this guy I work with) sold me his Heart's Greatest Hits CD for $1. Life is good.
What I want today: some inspiration. I'm jaded.
New stuff this month or so: The average age in America right now is 35.3. Well, TPG just turned 36, and I will in 3 months. So we are now officially: OLD as dirt.
Indy 500, varoooom! Rather than try to be inspired to write, I went drinking. My picks for the race were: little Al (Al Unser Jr., duh!), rookie Helio Castroneves, and Scott Goodyear. Scott and Al had early showers, but the Raging Rookie actually won the thing! He's young, he's good-looking, he's enthusiastic, and he's great for the sport; the Overnight Guy gives Helio 2 thumbs up for winning the Greatest Spectacle in Racing.
Pearl Harbor: the Titanic type of movie thing. I read in the paper that there's this Jap out here who's afraid that the movie will rekindle hate for the Japanese. Well, the movie might not, but I can try. Back in 1941, with a LATE declaration of war--almost no warning, the "Japs" crushed the Pacific side of the American navy. After we dropped 2 big bombs on them 4 years later, we did something unprecedented. We went to Japan and rebuilt their country back up--far better than it had ever been. In all my 35+ years of being alive, I've never heard one Jap say 'thanks' for that. All I ever hear is 'you Yankees drop big bombs on us; you bad people'. Screw them. So; to all you little Asian finger-pointers, I say "Fork you, chopstick; you started the fight." Let's go bomb them again, and scream 'you're welcome'.
What's different here than in college town: I could say so many things. In college town, you kind of expect for people to have a measure of intelligence; you know, "College Town". Out here, you expect people to be stupid, and they are, so it doesn't bother you as much. Hey look; another moron.
Life with Static Girl: She hates that I keep collecting plastic cups. She says
we have too many cups. She says that if we didn't have so many coffee
mugs--THEN we could have some more cups. Folks; wow, she is definitely
learning how to talk to me; because we are NOT throwing away ANY coffee
mugs. Maybe I'll, um, throw away some plastic cups.
In the mail, this credit card place, Visa, they were gonna give me a credit
card. No application fee, no annual fee, totally unsecured; it looked really
good to me. Boom. Static rips it from my fingers and throws it away. She
says that if I keep my job for another month that I will get many more credit
card offers. I'd been waiting 15 years for one good offer, and she snatched
it from me. That was cold.
A thought to take with you: Right before we do ANOTHER incredible
thought from the life of Edgar Cayce, I would like to point out that the
answer is not drugs, poison, or disease, but that:
"Worry and fear (are) the greatest foes to (a) normal healthy physical body."
Edgar Cayce--reading # 5497-1
What I want today: More money, more food, more sleep, and DSL--or just some high speed internet service.
New stuff this month or so: Code Red Mountain Dew is like mild, tongue-staining red cough syrup--with a monster kick! Yum. I can't find a new Snickers Crunchy candy bar. Del Taco does 3 tacos for $1, and I can eat some tacos. Damn I'm hungry.
There's a new bar in my world, Pink E's; it's big.
The Eatsa Pizza in our neighborhood finally opened.
TPG has his very own McDonalds; I'm so proud.
According to State Farm's calculations, 7th street and Bell road (where I live--in Phoenix) is the 4th worst intersection in the country for wrecks and stuff. Wow. However, in a survey of our own intersections, the city of Phoenix doesn't rate 7th street and Bell in the top 10. Pretty cool, huh?
What's different here than in college town: Hmmm. Since people are so much dumber out here, and since there are so many non-white, non-english speaking teenagers with children, and since all these other idiots are so unreliable, a decent-looking white guy with a good voice is a commodity.
Life with Static Girl: She and I continue to grow into each other. I can't imagine being any happier with a girlfriend (without causing complications).
For the beginning of July, I have lost the Static Queen for a week of east coast sight-seeing. It will hurt a little, but I will be productive and miss her for all of the right reasons. snif.
A thought to take with you: Be glad that I am an easily amused under-achiever. If I were not both of these things, then I would have caused alot of damage by now.